At the risk of revealing myself as an ignorant, lazy youth... studying sucks. When did I develop this dread for opening the school book? In high school I went through the motions because I didn't know what I wanted. I was a smart kid, my teachers gave me good grades, I enjoyed earning the highest grade in the class, so I continued to study without question. I only needed two weeks of college to see that with a world of opportunities ahead of me, I should discover my passion, what I could generate a rush from when I studied. Psychology I loved. Criminology I loved. Chemistry I loathed. And with a new purpose for studying--- to digest the tools I would need to excel in my beloved fields--- I dedicated study time to Psychology and Criminology (as well as Philosophy) and abandoned Chemistry. When an exam in Chemistry would near, I would cram enough facts in my brain to remember the best answers come test time, but I could not concentrate during that study time. For the first time since my elementary school days, my transcript showed a class in which I had received less than an A on. Instead, a big C+ stood beside the code CHM2045, a C+ I earned.

Ever since I turned my back on Chemistry, I struggle to focus in classes that don't elicit any excitement for me. Tomorrow I have my first exam of the semester, in Research Methods of Criminology. Our class time thus far has concentrated on tools for conducting research and statistical analysis, two concepts that don't exactly tickle my excitement bone (whew, that's bad!). The material should be simple enough for me to master between now and tomorrow afternoon, but here I am, writing in my blooger rather than studying. I've done many things this evening to distract myself from reading that dull textbook. I've checked the mail, balanced my checkbook, stared at the wall and thought about girls (the good and bad), read other bloogers, and created new away messages, among other trivial activities. The most recent away message I wrote, the one that's active on AIM as I write, depicts my confusion at what I saw in my kitchen. Here's what I wrote (notice that my going to the kitchen, my writing the away message, and my redistributing the message here all help me abstain from studying):

"Ok, so in another effort to avoid studying for tomorrow's exam, I went into the kitchen to get a caffeine drink. When I get there, I see my roommate Mason standing there with a cup with ice and an open bottle of lemon juice. I stare at him, at the cup, at the lemon juice hoping to find a rational reason for this scene. I can't find one, so I keep staring at Mason, desparate for an answer. He gives me one:
"That's the way I like it."
Now I'm more puzzled than ever."

On a side note, Mason later gave me another explanation, which puzzled me even further: "I don't like the way the water tastes from our tap." To quote Lewis Black, "Don't think about that statement for more than three minutes, or blood will shoot out your ears." I won't because I need to study. I would like to overcome this rut I'm in for only studying when the subject interests me. Right now I'm a student, and I want to fill the role as I'm supposed to.